[audio logo] ANNOUNCER 1: The Pennsylvania Game is made possible in part by-- [music playing] ANNOUNCER 2: Uni-Mart Convenience Stores, making your life easier every day of the year.

ANNOUNCER 3: This program was made possible by a grant from the Pennsylvania Public Television Network.

The network receives funding from the Commonwealth to provide public television for all Pennsylvanians.

ANNOUNCER 1: Let's get the game started.

How about a warm welcome for the host of The Pennsylvania Game, the irrepressible, irresistible, the irreverent Scott Bruce.

I love this studio audience.

Welcome, studio audience.

Welcome, viewers at home.

It's time for another round of The Pennsylvania Game.

And without any further ado, let's meet our panelists.

Starting number one, so you want to know who's who?

Well, our first panelist was recently invited to submit his biography and list of publications to Who's Who in America.

He's been writing satirical science fiction for more than four decades, most often under his pen name William Tenn.

Please welcome, Philip Klass.

[applause] She is manager of Electronic Communications for Penn State.

She recently answered the call to clown by completing a week of intensive training at the University of Wisconsin's world renowned clown camp, please say hello to Melisande McCrae.

[applause] And we're not clowning around with our next panelist.

He hails from State College where he's a meteorologist for Accuweather.

He's also a competitive, drug-free bodybuilder.

Please welcome Joe Bastardi.

[applause] I don't know, with a lineup like that, we can't go wrong.

So let's get started.

Wendy Williams, give me my first question.

ANNOUNCER 1: Dr. Elisha Kent Kane was a member of the illustrious Kane family of Philadelphia.

His brother General Thomas L. Kane was founder of the Borough of Kane.

His nephew Dr. Evan O'Neill Kane astounded the world when he performed self-surgery.

Although largely forgotten today, the legendary Elisha Kent Kane was an enormously popular figure in the 1850s.

Which of the following statements is not true about him?

A, the Kane Crater located in the northern region of the moon was named in his honor.

B, he was the first American to explore the Arctic.

C, his funeral in 1857 was the largest to-date in American history.

Or D, he popularized fly fishing, promoting it as the perfection of angling.

SCOTT BRUCE: All right, panelists, once again, remember, this is which one is not true about Elisha Kent Kane, the Kane Crater on the moon, the first American to explore the Arctic, his funeral was the largest to-date in 1857, or he popularized fly fishing.

Philip Klass, we're going to go to you first.

They go.

And-- B. I would say that he was-- I don't think he was the first American to explore the Arctic.

SCOTT BRUCE: You don't believe he was-- he wasn't into the cold?

He wasn't into the cold.

He was a warm blooded creature, I'd say.

And doesn't sound like-- So you buy the moon, you buy the fly fishing, but you're not buying the Artic.

The moon, especially.

I like that.

SCOTT BRUCE: OK. Melisande?

I chose A because it just seems too far out for him.

Yeah.

SCOTT BRUCE: You think the moon?

Yeah.

Yeah.

He might have been clowning up there, though.

You never know.

Joe Bastardi, what do you think?

Well I chose B. I thought that was a tough one because there are people that argue that Kane is in the Arctic.

But it's a very, very cold place, but I don't think he was up there in the Arctic regions.

SCOTT BRUCE: OK.

So we have-- So I agree with Philip.

SCOTT BRUCE: --two arctics and the moon.

You guys don't believe any of that exploratory stuff.

Let's see who is correct, if anyone.

ANNOUNCER 1: The answer is D. Dr. Elisha Kent Kane did not popularize fly fishing, but he was greatly admired for his spirit of adventure and love of investigation.

While in college, Kane contracted rheumatic fever which resulted in terminal heart damage.

Kane resolved to live a life that would be remembered.

He studied surgery, astronomy, chemistry, geology, and mineralogy.

After college, he joined the US Navy and set out to discover the world.

He became the first American to explore the Arctic.

His published accounts of his Arctic adventures held the nation spellbound and became the largest selling books of their time.

The legendary Elisha Kent Kane died in 1857 at the tender age of 37.

His funeral procession was an occasion of national mourning, unmatched until Lincoln's funeral a decade later.

The moon's Kane Crater and the Kane Basin, an important Arctic waterway, were both named in his honor.

The Kane Basin became known in the annals of exploration as the American gateway to the North pole.

And I'm guessing that the reason the funeral was so large was he probably discovered Santa Claus while he was up there in the-- [laughter] They're not buying it.

OK, Wendy, get me out of here.

ANNOUNCER 1: Located on 8TH and Race streets in Philadelphia, this unusual museum contains items ranging from the ornate to the pedestrian.

With over 700 items including 2 pound sabots, which date back to the late 18th century, the collection spans history and the globe.

What kind of museum is it?

A, a shoe museum.

B, a musical instrument museum.

C, a taxidermy museum.

Or D, an ax museum.

SCOTT BRUCE: Ooh, everybody punched in.

A shoe museum, a musical instrument museum, taxidermy, or an ax museum?

Melisande, you get to start off.

I'm hoping I get this one right.

I think it's A, a shoe museum because there's a foot clinic there around 8TH and Race.

SCOTT BRUCE: Foot clinic, shoes.

See you're using logic.

Maybe yes.

SCOTT BRUCE: Often get you in trouble in the Pennsylvania Game, but I like it.

Joe Bastardi, what do you think?

I put B because I have absolutely no idea.

The part of Philadelphia I hung out was in South Philly, so 8TH and Race street is not around there.

SCOTT BRUCE: It's just too far away.

It's much too far away for me.

Well, you got to move around Philly a little bit more.

But that's OK.

Guessing is good on the show.

JOE BASTARDI: At least, I know-- no idea at all.

Philip?

Well, I'll go with the musical instrument museum.

I think of Bose.

When I think of Bose, I think of fiddles and violins.

And, therefore, I go for B uncertainly but with the best most hope in the world.

OK.

So we have B, an A, and a B, a bab.

Let's find out what the correct answer is.

ANNOUNCER 1: The answer is A, the shoe museum located on the sixth floor of the Pennsylvania College of Podiatric Medicine is home to some 700 pairs of shoes.

More than 250 pairs are on exhibit, ranging from ornate leather or silk shoes worn by the well-heeled, including the first footwear of Nancy Reagan, Betty Ford, and Mamie Eisenhower, to those worn by commoners.

Among the pairs on display are two-heeled Abalone inlaid shoes from Morocco, a well worn pair of 6.5 inch high heels from the 1920s, and the late 18th century sabots.

During the French Revolution, disgruntled workers wore the heavy, wooden, and iron shoes with their cleat like studded soles to trample their employer's farm fields.

In later years, discontented workers tossed sabots into machinery, giving rise to the term saboteur.

Sabots.

Saboteur.

Here's an interesting oddity.

There is a beach ball-sized shoe of a woman in the museum from a woman who had suffered from giganticism in one leg.

And, I think, I said that word wrong, but she had just this big shoe, huge shoe.

And I understand that the snack shop at the museum serves shoofly pie.

[laughter] I thought-- on that happy note, let's go ahead and meet our panel and find out a little bit more about them.

Philip Klass, your latest novel Salvation will be published by St. Martin's Press sometime in '98.

We're looking forward to that.

I am interested in this.

I understand Hollywood is interested in purchasing all of your work or a specific work, tell us about that?

They've been interested in many of my stories.

One of my stories, Time in Advance is being produced by Universal, but that has been purchased.

The big thing is my most famous story, Child's Play is being considered by Paramount.

And I've been very excited about that.

My agent told me last week that the final and conclusive meeting on the subject would be held on Wednesday.

And I called them Wednesday afternoon with my breath going in and out.

And I said, what about it?

And he said, well, the result of the final and conclusive meeting was they decided to have another final in conclusion meeting.

SCOTT BRUCE: Welcome to Hollywood, as they say.

Yes, yes.

All right, let's move along.

Melisande, clown school?

Yes.

SCOTT BRUCE: Clown College as it were.

I couldn't be happier.

What possessed you?

I never thought twice about clowning, but the idea popped into my head this past New Year's Eve.

SCOTT BRUCE: New Year's Eve.

And I got on the web and found out about this camp and went last May.

So I spent a week learning practical physical comedy.

So we learned how to make funny faces like this one.

[laughter] And we did some other things there, juggling, balloon animals.

So I have a clown character now.

SCOTT BRUCE: New Year's Eve, huh?

Yes.

Perhaps maybe had a cup or two.

Joe Bastardi, drug-free weight bodybuilder.

Now, this is fascinating to me is.

Is this becoming the trend now?

Are we going to have a lot less drug use in bodybuilding?

Probably as little as we have in most competitive sports, which means probably not.

SCOTT BRUCE: Probably not.

But yeah, it's the type of thing where you're constantly trying to get in better shape, so it keeps me young.

I better stay in shape.

My wife's 11 years younger than me, and I got a little boy who's 40 years younger than me.

SCOTT BRUCE: Well, chasing him will do it.

I'm sure right there.

Yeah, he keeps me in shape.

OK.

Very good.

What do you say we get a new question for these panelists.

ANNOUNCER 1: On August 15th, 1965, by act of the General Assembly, an official state dog of the Commonwealth was named.

The breed was favored by William Penn, founder of Pennsylvania.

Is it the A, English Pointer.

B, Golden Retriever.

C, Boxer.

Or D, Great Dane.

SCOTT BRUCE: Ooh, a bunch of dogs.

English Pointer, Golden Retriever, Boxer, or Great Dane.

Joe, we're going to first on this one.

What do you think?

My finger keeps-- the more I try to push it in one place, it keeps going to be B.

So that's why I went with the Golden Retriever.

SCOTT BRUCE: You've got B fever over there.

Yes, I do.

OK, well, we'll see if it works out for you.

Philip?

Well, Pennsylvania is a state where hunting is very popular, and the Golden Retriever figures in hunting.

So not knowing my way but hoping for the best, that's where I went.

Another B.

We've got a pair of B's.

Melisande?

Or as I understand from my earpiece, Sweet Potato.

Yes.

SCOTT BRUCE: That's her clown name.

[laughter] Melisande, what do you think?

You have a third B. I think Golden Retriever.

SCOTT BRUCE: Three B's.

What does that mean when we get three B's, when everybody has the same answer, everybody wins a lottery ticket.

Pass those down if you would.

[applause] OK. Now, let's find out if it worked out in the right answer.

ANNOUNCER 1: The answer is D, the Great Dane became the official state dog of Pennsylvania in 1965.

Why the Great Dane over other breeds?

For starters, the Great Dane like William Penn came from England.

A painting by artist Violet Oakley that's displayed in the Governor's Reception Room depicts the Great Dane as Penn's best friend.

With characteristics similar to Pennsylvania's, powerful Great Dane, one of the giant working breeds, is regal, strong, and elegant.

SCOTT BRUCE: OK, let's go and check our tote board now.

It looks like Philip has 0; Melisande, 1; Joe, 0.

Melisande is currently leading.

And that means it's time for our first clue in the Mystery Pennsylvanian, and get your pens ready.

Here we go.

Born in Pittsburgh in 1889, the famous playwright began his career as drama critic for the New York Times.

Born in Pittsburgh, 1889, the famous playwright began his career as drama critic for The New York Times.

This is your first of three clues.

Write it on the first line.

If you get it right all three times, you get 3 points.

But if you change your answer, then it changes.

Everybody seems to be writing something.

Everybody seems to know something.

And that's a good thing because it's time for our next question.

Vance Packard, a longtime resident of State College and graduate of Penn State, died in 1996.

A former editor of the Center Daily Times, he later became a best-selling author.

Between 1946 and 1989, he wrote 10 books, many of them focusing on a particular theme that launched him into the national limelight.

Was Vance Packard A, one of the nation's first consumer watchdogs, B, father of the self-help movement, C, the first to report secret government testing of experiments, Or D, a pioneer in the development of full length books on audiotape?

Vance Packard, consumer watchdog, self-help movement, secret government testing, or develop a marketing of full length books on audiotape.

Philip Klass?

I should know it, but I don't.

I think, however, he was one of the nation's first consumer watchdogs.

It just sounds right.

SCOTT BRUCE: An educated guess.

Well, an ignorant guess.

An ignorant guess.

And we love when people admit that.

Melisande, what do you think.

I have no idea.

I put D. SCOTT BRUCE: Another ignorant guess.

Yes.

I like this.

It's an ignorant panel.

I like that.

It's fun.

Joe Bastardi, give me an ignorant guess.

Well, I'm happy because ignorance is bliss.

And I'm sticking with B. SCOTT BRUCE: B, it's a B movement.

And I think bee is going to be the right answer eventually.

Let's find out-- JOE BASTARDI: That's my theory.

ANNOUNCER 1: The answer is A. Vance Packard is regarded as one of the fathers of the consumer movement.

His best selling books focused on such issues as consumerism, the corporate rat race, biomedical research, and the decline of the American family and community.

The Hidden Persuaders, which was on bestsellers list for 50 weeks, was followed by The Status Seekers.

His best selling 1960 book, The Waste Makers was a criticism of manufacturers' strategy of building in planned obsolescence rather than quality to generate sales.

His work as a consumer watchdog launched him into the national limelight.

Consumers praised Packard's work which sounded the wake up call to businesses to become more aware of consumer issues and more responsible about product safety.

Packard's work led to the creation of the Consumer Product Safety Commission.

So when your children's cabbage patch doll starts eating her hair at night, you've got him to thank to help get it all squared away for you.

And that is it.

So let's get one other question.

ANNOUNCER 1: In December, 1937, the Bethlehem Chamber of Commerce launched a campaign and enlisted the support of nearly 1800 Chambers of Commerce nationwide in an effort to have their great city recognized as what?

A, the Christmas city of the US.

B, America's steel city.

C, the gateway to the West.

Or D, the Switzerland of America.

SCOTT BRUCE: OK, as Bethlehem the Christmas city, America's steel city, gateway to the West, or Switzerland of America.

Melisande, we get to start with you.

I picked B just because maybe-- SCOTT BRUCE: Bethlehem steel.

Yeah, exactly, Bethlehem steel.

Again, logical.

Probably won't work on our show.

Joe?

Well, I picked B too.

SCOTT BRUCE: Joe, we're shocked.

Now, what would happen?

It'd be terrible if I picked A, which I have a gut feeling it's A.

But it wound up being B. SCOTT BRUCE: Then you would pick kick yourself.

Yeah, so-- SCOTT BRUCE: So you stayed with B?

I'm sticking with B. OK, Philip, what do you think?

Joe's gut whispered to me that it was A, and I go with A. SCOTT BRUCE: Yes.

I pay attention to his gut.

SCOTT BRUCE: Yes.

it was a very smart move too, I think.

Joe, I think you blew it again.

Let's find out.

ANNOUNCER 1: The answer is A. Bethlehem was settled by Moravian missionaries on Christmas Eve, 1741, and named for the birthplace of Christ.

In 1937, the head of the chamber of commerce wanted Bethlehem named the nation's Christmas city.

Letters were sent to chambers of commerce around the country explaining what the city was attempting to do and asking them to publicize it in their local papers.

Media nationwide advertise Bethlehem as the Christmas city of the US.

People were invited to send their Christmas cards to Bethlehem to receive the stamp of Christmas city.

And nearly 200,000 people complied.

The city also erected an 81-foot high Christmas star on South Mountain.

Its illuminated all year long.

How many people playing along at home wonder if possibly Joe got all B's in school?

Yeah, right.

We don't know, but it's time to check our score.

Joe, still on his goose egg with his B's.

It's Melisande, 1 point.

Philip into the lead with 2 points.

[applause] Get your pens ready.

Time for the Mystery Pennsylvanian.

Here's your second clue.

Known for his wisecracks, he became a household name and television personality in 1949 as a regular panelist on This is Show Business.

Panelists should recognize that, don't you think?

Known for his wisecracks, he became a household name and television personality in 1949 as a regular panelist on This is Show Business.

Born in Pittsburgh in 1889, the famous playwright became began his career as drama critic for The New York Times.

OK, everybody seems to be writing.

And that means it's time for Wendy Williams to bring me one new question.

ANNOUNCER 1: Linnaeus, the father of botany, called John Bartram the greatest natural botanist in the world.

Bartram was the first in America to travel through the colonies seeking samples for classifications.

His travels brought to light such discoveries as the spice sassafras, the tulip tree, and the American lotus, to name just a few.

Which of the following cannot be attributed to John Bartram?

A, he discovered the Franklin tree.

B, he published America's first printed plant catalog.

C, he was the first to identify the poison ivy, or D, he was the official botanist to King George III.

SCOTT BRUCE: Well, let's see, what did old Bertram do?

What did he not do, that's what we're looking for here, panelists.

Did he just not discover the Franklin tree?

Did he not publish America's first printed plant catalog?

Identify the poison ivy or official botanist to King George.

Joe, all the way down to you.

I have a feeling.

B. SCOTT BRUCE: It's a B.

The studio audience is shocked.

We can't believe it.

Joe went with B. Philip, how about you?

Well, this time I'm far from him.

I go with D. I don't see him as the official botanist to an English King.

SCOTT BRUCE: You don't think that could have happened?

It didn't sound right to me, OK, gut feeling on that one.

Melisande?

I don't know.

I picked A. SCOTT BRUCE: You picked A, the Franklin tree because it was named after Franklin.

Yes, exactly.

SCOTT BRUCE: That would make sense.

Good point.

Once again our panelists have proven to all be incorrect.

ANNOUNCER 1: The answer is C. John Bartram was not the first to identify the poison ivys, but he did discover the Franklin tree, which he named in honor of his friend Ben Franklin.

Discovered in Georgia, Bartram brought the tropical looking tree back to Philadelphia.

Unfortunately, the Franklin tree was never again found growing in the wild.

Of the few Franklin's that are growing today, all have been propagated from cuttings taken from the original tree Bartram found well over 200 years ago.

As the King's botanist in America, he introduced about 500 new species of plants from the New World to the Old World.

Bartram and his son William published the nation's first plant catalog.

Bartram's Botanical Garden, the first of its kind in America, is one of Philadelphia's major tourist attractions.

Listen to these crazy names they have for trees down at Bartram's Gardens, the Kentucky coffee tree, and my favorite, the toothache tree.

You just walk under it and go oh!

Ugh!

Enough of that foolishness.

It's time to move on.

Wendy Williams, one more question please.

ANNOUNCER 1: Fannie Sellins lived and worked in Pennsylvania's Allegheny Valley from 1917 to 1919.

Considered by some an angel of mercy, by others a thorn in the side.

She was openly threatened by her adversaries.

on August 26th, 1919, she was shot and killed.

Why was she murdered?

A, for practicing euthanasia.

B, for helping to organize non-union workers urging them to for better pay and working conditions.

C, for removing children she felt were abused or neglected from their homes.

Or D, an herbalist and healer, she was believed to be practicing witchcraft.

SCOTT BRUCE: Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, assisting the sick, helping unionized workers, removing children, or practicing witchcraft.

Philip, to you.

I go with B. I sort of have a feeling about that.

I have Joy's gut feeling about B. SCOTT BRUCE: Got Joe's gut feeling?

I'm with B now.

SCOTT BRUCE: And it's a B?

And it's a B. Oh-oh, oh-oh.

Melisande?

I don't know.

I picked D. It seemed like witchcraft would be a pretty big deal.

SCOTT BRUCE: And for a clown that's a good thing, witchcraft.

OK, Joe?

I picked B, but I actually had a reason this time.

[laughter] It seems like that's the time, as I understand it, where things were going with the unions and anti-unions and all that stuff.

There was a method behind my madness, and it's probably wrong, anyway.

SCOTT BRUCE: Is there a chance that Joe will get up off his goose egg.

Let's find out right now.

ANNOUNCER 1: The answer is B.

An organizer for the United Mine Workers of America, Fannie Sellins was sent to Allegheny Valley in 1917.

A well-known, anti-union area, Sellins helped miners organize.

She visited them during strikes, aided women and children, and cared for their sick.

Miners and their families regarded her as an angel of mercy.

Allegheny Valley coal operators considered her a thorn in their side.

On August 26th, 1919, miners from the Allegheny Coal and Coke company were striking.

Sellins was on the scene when several deputy sheriffs and a mine official attacked the strikers.

Shots were fired killing both Sellins and local steelworker Joseph Strzelecki.

10 deputies were charged with the murders, but no one was ever punished.

But rather than scaring workers off, Sellins murder inspired more workers to unionize.

In 1920, UMWA workers built a memorial at Sellin's grave in Union Cemetery in Arnold.

SCOTT BRUCE: And what can that mean?

Time for our third clue in the Mystery Pennsylvanian.

Here we go.

Although, he didn't take it with him, the Pulitzer Prize winning playwright died with more than 80 plays, musicals, and short stories to his credit.

Although, he didn't take it with him-- he didn't-- the Pulitzer prize winning playwright died with more than 80 plays, musicals, and short stories to his credit.

Born in Pittsburgh in 1889, the famous playwright began his career as a drama critic for The New York Times.

Known for his wisecracks, he became a household name and television personality in 1949 as a regular panelist on This is Show Business.

And that means it's time to go to Melisande.

You are going to give us your first answer, please.

My first answer was don't know.

Second was still don't know.

And the third is really don't know.

So I'm done.

We know why she's a clown right there.

That's funny.

Joe, going down to you.

What do you think?

My first symbol is a recurving tropical storm moving out to sea.

Second one was hurricane King.

That was a hurricane that hit Miami in 1950.

I figured that was close to '49.

And the third is I'm ignorant.

[laughter] Looks like we've been tough.

Philip, what do you think?

Well, my first answer was wrong, and I knew it when I wrote it.

SCOTT BRUCE: Walter Kerr?

Walter Kerr.

My second answer was wrong, and I knew it when I wrote it, but what could I do.

Steve Allen.

But my third answer was right, and I knew when I wrote it.

SCOTT BRUCE: George S. Kauffman.

Your hint was absolutely-- SCOTT BRUCE: Too good to believe.

--too good to believe.

Let's find out if my hint was as good as it seems.

ANNOUNCER 1: George S. Kauffman, one of the most successful playwrights and directors in the history of Broadway, was born in Pittsburgh in 1889 and attended Pittsburgh Central High School.

In 1917, he left law school to become drama critic for The New York Times.

He kept the position until 1930, long after achieving success as a playwright.

He collaborated with Morrie Ryskind and George and Irah Gershwin and won the first Pulitzer Prize ever awarded for a musical for of Thee I Sing.

Five years later, he won his second Pulitzer for You Can't Take it With You.

One of the many Broadway comedies and musicals he directed was Guys and Dolls for which he won a Tony Award.

Kauffman died in 1961 with more than 80 plays, musicals, and short stories to his credit.

George Kauffman, a famous Pennsylvanian.

OK. And checking the big tote board, we have Philip with 4.

Melisande, 1.

Joe, 1.

Philip is our champion.

[applause] ANNOUNCER 1: Well, Scott, it's one night's free lodging at the Appleford Inn in historic Gettysburg, a gift basket of organic foods from Walnut Acres of Penns Creek and 50 chances to win a $1,000 a week for life from the Pennsylvania lottery.

SCOTT BRUCE: OK, that's it.

We're running out of time.

Thanks for joining us on The Pennsylvania Game.

Tune in again next week.

We'd love to have you.

Thanks, studio audience.

Congratulations to all our panelists.

Thanks for being here.

[applause] ANNOUNCER 1: The Pennsylvania Game is made possible in part by-- ANNOUNCER 2: Uni-Mart Convenience Stores, making your life easier every day of the year.

ANNOUNCER 3: This program was made possible by a grant from the Pennsylvania Public Television Network.

The network receives funding from the Commonwealth to provide public television for all Pennsylvanians.

ANNOUNCER 1: Meals and lodging for contestants of The Pennsylvania Game were provided by The Nittany Lion Inn, located on the University Park campus of Penn State.

[applause]